Funemployement.

I’m not going to lie, the idea of a white, blank document during the summertime is more daunting then the idea of a white, blank document the night before a paper is due. I run from the little blue W in the icon bar of my Mac. I fear the red squiggly line under words I type. I try not to come close to writing comprehensively for quite some time after the school year is over. Call me crazy, I’ll call myself a recovering type-a-holic, and that is why I’ve been steering far from writing this summer.

            But, I cant run fast (literally and figuratively) from the blank pages of this blog. It is much harder to keep up when it’s not a source of procrastination and distraction during class and library time. And it is much harder to keep up when you’ve got a world full of empty days and long, sleepless nights. Nonetheless, I am back. My hiatus from the blogging world is gone, and I will serve you one last post before my next adventure.

            Cheers to this summer, already longer than my last. It’s a bizarre thing to think that I’ve only had a two-month summer my whole life, and now its doubled in size for the next four years. Last fall, I had no idea what the heck I was going to do with all the time I had this summer. I was pretty certain I’d get a job at a small frozen yogurt shop, or I would intern somewhere shiny and fancy to make myself look good, or maybe even I’d just stay at home (as my mom wanted me to) and soak up freedom without falling into a pit of laze. But another path would be chosen for me, just as it always is, and I’d end up in a new world of opportunities and friends and I would love it, because that’s what my Father wants me to do, and my plans are like post-it notes compared to His big canvas.

            I would be accepted and assigned to do YoungLife summer staff in June. I wouldn’t get my first choice of job, but I would realize right away that I needed to be challenged, and that’s why He wanted me there. I would get assigned to this month and this camp with a handful of my already closest friends, including two of my very best girlfriends, one new, one old. And I would see it as a backbone, a built in support system, before entering the next network and system together. And I would wait, and wait, counting the months, thinking, “If only it was June yet… I cant wait for it to be June…” and then it would get to be may, and I’d say, “I’m leaving in {blank} weeks, write me a letter because that’s the only way I can communicate, yeah, it’ll be great, I’m excited, yes, I’m working as a morning cook, I know, I know, early mornings, it’ll be good though” over and over again as I catch up with the world I left behind while at school. He knew it was coming, I didn’t for sure, but He did. He knew all the “I woulds” before the “I dids” and I love that about Him. And just as the future turns to present, I will leave on Sunday for this adventure. I’ll be gone for a month in the luscious Adirondacks of New York at a YoungLife camp that was my first ever YoungLife camp back when I was a dweeby little sophomore in high school (I’m still a dweeb).

            I’ll return to Arlington in July. I’ll probably hate it for a few days. The after-camp withdrawal will be on the highest notch. But, I’ll get used to my surroundings, as I always do. And I’ll be back home for just a week, and then it is on to the next. I’ll go on a family vacation where I’ll probably sleep and vegetate, getting back into the normal summer swing of things after a month of hard work. I’ll return from that, unpack, wash, and pack, then drive back down to CNU where I’ll pick up Tabb girls and turn back around to go to Rockbridge for summer camp. This in itself is more exciting than summer staff, no matter how long I’ve waited to do that, this is what it is all about. I’ll get to lead, walk along side, encourage, and talk with these high school girls for a whole week at a magical camp. I’ll hopefully be able to tell them “yes, I get that, I’ve been there, and here is the way out” and see the magic of the Lords unfailing love unfold before my eyes, a sight that never gets old and always gets me sobbing towards the end of the week. I’ll return from that, a little more tired than when I left, with a few more friendship bracelets on my wrists and a few more stories in my heart. And I’ll get in the car one more time except this time, it wont be a car. It’ll be the big, gold fifteen passenger van of the Hagelins, where twelve of my closest friends and I were in last summer for 20 hours after graduation. Except, this time it’ll just be about six of my closest girl friends, catching up about our new worlds and lives and reliving our glory days of falling in and out of love and trouble. We’ll drive forever to a beautiful island with glorious sights that give us a small taste of the beauty above. And I’ll be given this time to reconnect with these girls who hold my heart close to theirs, we’ll fellowship and love. We’ll get the chills and we’ll get sunburned, and it’ll all be in the big beautiful picture our God is painting, each of us with a different color to make His art pleasing.

            In the mean time, I’ve been here. At home. In my big cozy house I’ve lived in for 15 years, with a family that loves me and makes me laugh. And a cat that has special needs. I’ve been here with the friends who have seen be through it all, and the friends I have just recently found. I’ve been here waking up in the afternoon and going to sleep in the morning, the only way that summer is supposed to be done. I’ve been here talking the future, saying “it’ll be weird when we’re all married, what are we going to do with our lives?” And I’ve been here, counting my blessings daily, trying to soak up this beautiful world that has been handed to me on a mostly silver platter by a God who shows me how to polish the spots that get rusty. I’ve been here thanking Him for all He has done, is doing, and will do, because its all so beautiful to me. And I’ve been here, quite possibly having and about to have the best summer of my life, living as a beloved daughter who has been given freedom and the best job of all: being funemployed.